Reasons I like my cat more than you.

Today was Tuesday, which is basically just a second Monday. On top of that, it marks a week since I got back from my glorious holiday and that means I was no longer in beautiful Spain, but instead was at work. It also marks a week since I last ate meat or dairy and I’m having severe cheese withdrawal symptoms. Oh, and it was sunny and at least 14 degrees but somehow managed to snow (its fucking APRIL), and all humans around me seemed to be in arse hole mode (a bit like I am I suppose).For those reasons, I reverted back to not just being a stroppy teenager, oh no, but a full blown toddler and had a tantrum and hated anyone who wasn’t my cat. Not really that different to most days in fairness... Here’s why.

 

1. My cat doesn’t have as go at me for being late to stuff

2. My cat doesn’t make me do paperwork I don’t want to do

3. If my cat had a phone, she would fucking text me back

4. She would probably text me first actually.

5. My cat has not once asked me why I’m going vegan

6. Or called me a hippie

7. Or told me I need psychiatric help for going vegan (thanks Ma)

8. My cat doesn’t judge me for drinking alone

9. My cat doesn’t judge me for being hungover

10. My cat doesn’t harass me on Tinder

11. My cat doesn’t send me unwanted dick pics

12. She only wants to get me into bed for cuddles

13. And when she says cuddles, she literally means cuddles

14. My cat doesn’t ride her bicycle at 0.5 mph in front of my bus when I’m on my way home from work

15. My cat isn’t a 13 year old chav getting mouthy on my bus on my way home from work

16. My cat still loves me with no makeup on

17. My cat still loves me when my hair is dirty

18. And when I haven’t shaved my legs for two weeks(ok, four weeks)

19. My cat doesn’t have a go at me for being messy

20. My cat doesn’t lecture me about my poor life choices

21. My cat doesn’t think giving her a cuddle is flirting

22. My cat likes my singing

23. And she’s fluffy and COOT

 

She does dribble on my face and sit on my phone when I’m trying to use it though. But I suppose nobody is perfect.

I realise this post gets me no adult points. That’s fine, I didn’t want to adult today anyway. I am wanting to adopt a slightly more positive outlook on life though, as I have a tendency to be a bit of a grump and / or jump into panic mode and worst case scenario when things go wrong. However, I will always stand by having a big old MOAN whenever I want to anyone who will listen. It’s free therapy. And once I’ve done it I will be in a better mind frame to be positive – I mean, I feel better already! I’m planning on exercising and starting yoga (really going to help my new vegan hippie reputation) to see if they help with positivity and mood in the way people claim they do. I imagine they’re just going to cause someone of my fitness level pain, and that brings me absolutely no positivity or joy. But I suppose we will see.

Vegan week 1 blog is coming for anyone that is at all interested, but I’m waiting until I get paid so my meals are slightly more exciting than rice and salt. It was all going fine till my housemates cooked roast beef on Sunday – but fear not, I stayed strong. 

Send me pictures of your cats. 

Thanks, 

Happy adulting! x